If Midorima were Gay
by TsukiriZanrai
Summary: Takao tries to make Midorima confess that he's gay with a song. Song taken from Avenue Q's 'If You Were Gay'. It's just basically Takao singing the song with Midorima trying very hard not to put him in the blender. I suppose its a kind of a Song!fic, but its definitely a Crack!fic. ONESHOT, MidoTaka, quite fluffy.


Lol here's a completely random crackfic

It's from this Avenue Q song (just put the youtube dot com slash in front of it) watch?v=BuR5YMyfeNI

You guys don't know how much I'm amused at myself over writing this because seriously this is one of the most perf songs for MidoTaka

(Would anyone believe me if I said I heard this song when I was 10 but I didn't realize what the hell was going on until this year lol)

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Kurobas, their characters, Avenue Q, or their songs

(Also I had to alter a bit of the words to better fit Midorima and Takao)

* * *

Midorima sighs and settles on his sofa. Putting a book on his lap, he started to flip to the page where he stopped.

"Finally. Takao went out for some groceries," Midorima murmured to himself, "No Takao to pull me away from my studies."

"Hi Shin-chan!" Takao yells happily as he pushes the front door open.

"Hi Takao." Midorima monotonously says.

"Ne, Shin-chan, you'd never guess what happened on the train this morning!" Takao was still yelling as he sat beside Midorima on the sofa.

"This guy," Takao continued even though Midorima told him that he would ignore him, "Was smiling at me and talking to me!"

"Yeah, okay, very interesting," Midorima said while trying to read his book.

"He was being _reeeeeaaaaal _friendly! I think he was coming on to me," Takao was still yelling, "I think he might've thought that I was gay!"

The shooting guard cleared his throat, "Why are you telling me this? Why should I care, I don't care. Did you buy my red bean drink?"

"Aw, Shin-chan, you don't have to get all defensive!" Takao teased.

"I'm not getting defensive!" Midorima yells a little too loudly and was a little too quick to response.

"I don't care about some gay guy you met okay. I'm trying to read," Taped fingers push glasses back up as Midorima trains his eyes back on the text.

"I didn't mean anything by it Shin-chan. I just think its something we should be able to talk about," Takao says slowly as if he was trying to pronounce large words but Midorima snaps back quicker than a rubber band, "But I don't want to talk about this Takao, this conversation is over."

"But Shin-cha—"

"_Over."_

Takao pouts but a few seconds later he grins, "Well okay. But just so you know…"

Midorima looks up at Takao who was grinning at him and the raven continues, "If you were gay, that'll be okay. I mean 'cause hey! I'd love you anyways!"

Midorima groans as he puts his hands to his ears but Takao pulls his right hand off and continues saying (or singing).

"Because you see, if it were me I would feel free to say that I was gay!" Takao yells but lowers his voice a bit for the next part, "But I'm not gay. Except maybe for you."

"Takao please, I'm trying to read," Midorima frowns in irritation to hide his emotion.

Takao stares at Midorima for a few seconds and Midorima stares back. Soon, the point guard tilted his face and gave Midorima a sly grin.

"What?!" Midorima yells and Takao continues on, "If you were queer!"

"Takao!"

"I'd still be here!"

"Takao, I'm trying to read this book."

"Year after year!"

"Takao!"

"Because you're dear to me!"

Midorima groans and pinches the bridge of his nose.

"And I know that you…" Takao trails off.

"What?" Midorima said skeptically.

"Would accept me toooooo!"

"I won't."

"If I told you today 'Hey guess what, I'm gay!' " Takao shouted and then adds "But only for you."

"I'm happy just being with you!" Takao tries to hug Midorima but the green-haired man pushes him back.

"Does that mean you'd trishaw me everywhere."

Takao ignores Midorima's statement and continues, "So what should it matter to me what you do in bed with guys!"

"_Takao! That is __**gross!**__" _Midorima shouts back.

"No its not!" Takao giggles and keeps going, "If you were gay!"

Midorima groans and plants his face in his book.

"I'd shout hooray!"

"I am not listening," Midorima tells Takao.

"And here I'd stay!"

The green-haired teen plugs his ears with two fingers and dishes out the la's.

"But I wouldn't get in your way!"

Midorima almost shouts in frustration and annoyance.

"You can count on me to always be beside you everyday to tell you its okay, you were just born that way, and as they say, its in your DNA, you're gay!"

"I am _not _gay!" Midorima screams.

"If you _were _gay!" Takao points out and sniggers.

The green haired man shouts exasperatedly and flings his book at the grinning raven.


End file.
